Types of Java

Arzz hai

Do Tarah ki hoti hai "JAVA"

Wah Wah..... Wah Wah

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Do Tarah ki hoti hai "JAVA" ..............

Lafjon ko samjhiye ...... Gaur kijiye

Do Tarah ki hoti hai "JAVA"..............
Bahot Khub......

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Bhaijaan - Do hi Tarah ki hoti hai "JAVA" ..............

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Mar "JAVA" , Mit "JAVA"

Bhagvan Ram

Ek baar ek vyakti ki patni kho jati hai. Bahut dhoondhta hai per kahin nahin milti. To vo rota rota ja raha hota hai ki use bhagvan Ram ka mandir dikhta hai. Vo rote rote Ramji se apna dukhada kahta hai. Aur bahut deer tak prathana karta rahta hai.

Thodi der baad bhagvan Ram ki aawaz aati hai.

"Vats ro mat. Tu mandir se nikal aur seedhe sadak per chal. Doosre mod se mud jana aur thodi hi door per thujhe peepal ka ped milega. Tu vahan ja"

Aadmi bada khush hota hai aur Ramji se poochta hai. "Bhagwaan vahan mujhe meri patni mil jayegi?"

Ramji ka javaab aata hai....

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"Nahin, per vahan Hanumaanji ka Mandir hai milega. Jab meri patni kho gayi thi to vahi doondh kar layethe...."

What is RED and goes TRING TRING TRING

Ques. 1 : What is RED and goes TRING TRING TRING ????
Scroll Down for answer















A TOMATO....... AND THE TRING TRING TRING WAS TO CONFUSE YOU......

Anyways... Here s one more....

Ques 2 : What is RED and goes TRING TRING TRING ???? Scroll Down for answer















The DOOR BELL and the RED was to CONFUSE you......

Anyways... Here s one more....

Ques 3 : What is RED and goes TRING TRING TRING ????

Scroll Down for answer















A CAKE .... and both were to confuse you....

Anyways... Here s one more....

Ques 4 : What is RED and goes TRING TRING TRING ????

Scroll Down for answer



















A FIRE BRIGADE OBVIOUSLY........... AND U THOT I WAS TRYING TO CONFUSE YOU................

How to catch a lion?

Newton's Method
Let, the lion catch you.
For every action there is equal and
opposite reaction. Implies you caught
lion.


Einstein Method
Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion.
Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will also run faster and will get tired soon. Now you can trap it easily.


Software Engineer Method
Catch a cat and claim that your testing has proven that its a Lion. If anyone comes back with issues tell that you will upgrade it to Lion.


Indian Police Method
catch any animal and interrogate it & torture it to accept that its a lion.


Rajnikanth Method
Keep warning the lion that u may come and attack anytime. The lion will live in fear and die soon in fear itself.


Ramarajan Method
Remove the make-up and put it over lion. The lionwill die notwithstanding that heavy weight.


Jayalalitha Method
Send Police commissioner Muthukaruppan around 2AM and kill it, while it's sleeping !


Manirathnam Method (director)
Make sure the lion does not get sun light and put the lion in a dark room with a single candle lighted.
Keep murmuring something in its ears. The lion will be highly irritated and commit suicide.


Karan Johar Method (director)
Send a lioness into the forest. Our lion and lioness fall in love with each other. Send another lioness in to the forest, followed by another lion.
First lion loves the first lioness and the second lion loves the 2nd lioness. But 2nd lioness loves both lions. Now send another lioness(third) into the forest.
You don't understand right... ok....read it after 15 yrs, then also u wont !


Yash Chopra method (director)
Take the lion to Australia or US.. and kill it in a good scenic location.


Govinda method
Continuously dance before the lion for 5 or 6 days.


Menaka Gandhi method
save the lion from a danger and feed him with some vegetables continuously.


George bush method
Link the lion with Osama bin laden and shoot him!!!


Ravi Shastri method
Ask the lion to bowl at u. U bat for 200 balls and score 1 run

Test Your Common Sense

Question Number 1

How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

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The correct answer is:
Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door.

This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

Question Number 2

How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

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Wrong Answer:
Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator.

Correct Answer:
Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door.

This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions.

Question Number 3

The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?

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Correct Answer:

The Elephant
The Elephant is in the refrigerator.
Remember?

This tests your memory.

OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your abilities.

Question Number 4

There is a river you must cross. But crocodiles inhabit it.
How do you manage it?

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Correct Answer:

You swim across. Why?
All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Conference!!!

This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

Complan Boy

An Elephant meets an Ant!!
On Introduction:

Ant : Haathi tumhari umar kitni hai?

Elephant: Paanch Saal !!!

Ant : Paanch Saal aur itnay bade !!!

Elephant: I AM A COMPLAN BOY .

Elephant: Cheenti tumhari umar kitni hai ?

Ant: Tees Saal.

Elephant: Tees Saal aur itni chhoti.



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Ant: Haan .... I AM A SANTOOR GIRL.... MERI TWACHA SEY MERI UMAR KA PATA HI NAHI CHALTA !

Hanumaan

ek aadmi ki 6 ungliyan(6 fingers) hoti hain... sab log use "Hanuman"

keh kar bulate hain... batao kyun??? .

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Ans: kyounki uska naam hanuman hai!!!!

PJ Book

I'll write a book on PJs and dedicate it to whom?

Ans: our president.... why?

scroll down for answer .

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coz he is Mr. a.P.J.abdul kalam

Three Cockroaches

Three cockroaches were going on the road, suddenly one of them started singing the song – “AASHIQ BANAYA AAPNE”.

Few mins later, all the three cockroaches died......any idea why?????

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COZ the song is HIT (cockroach spray) ......

Nag Panchami

Q) What is opposite of “Nag Panchami”

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A) “Nag Did Not Punch Me”

GK

Once there was an Indian student.

He was very briliant, and his General Knowledge (GK) was excellent.

He won every Quizes in the institute .... Once he fell in love with a Phirang girl...

He proposed the girl, but She straight way rejected him ... calling him Bloody Desi...

So after this, his GK fell drastically, and he stopped taking part in Quiz and all.....

Now, u tell me the reason... WHY ???

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Guess????

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The answer is:

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Jab Dil Hi tut gaya..
Hum GK kya karenge......